How do i make a funnel cake? please help.?

Okay so today is my boyfriends birthday, and he really likes funnel cakes. So i really want to make him one, but i don't know the best recipe or way to make one. Please this is an emergency, if i don't make him this funnel cake, or at least make it right. He will hit me again, i've been hit so many times. He told me that if I leave him he will hunt me down and hit me some more, so i'm scared to leave him. So someone please help me if you care about my face. HELP ME.